I am not much of a crier. I would say I'm quite emotional and dramatic but I don't cry that easily. But, the last couple of weeks have been different. On Thursday, May 15, my little baby finished preschool and graduated with cap and gown. Although I didn't cry at the graduation I probably would have if Lyla hadn't been crawling all over me. Then the following Wednesday, I got a call from a fellow teacher at preschool. When I answered the phone I knew it wasn't good. She was obviously upset and simply said, Jenny, Maria Chapman just passed away. Maria was a student at our preschool. She actually had just graduated with Grace the previous Friday. Her sister, Stevey Joy, was in Grace's class and graduated too. In a tragic accident, her 17 year old brother hit her with his car in the driveway and she passed away very quickly. I didn't know Maria extremely well. I never had her in my class at preschool but did have her when I worked in the extended day program once a week. She was the youngest daughter of the Chapman family. Steven Curtis Chapman is a gospel music singer that lives here in Franklin. He is an amazing singer, Christian, and dad. Steven even sang at the graduation. He sang his hit song, Cinderella, that was inspired by Maria and Stevey Joy. The song is about a dad who decides to dance with "Cinderella" "while she is here in my arms" because before you know it the clock with strike twelve and "she'll be gone". It goes through the dad dancing with his little Cinderella and then the girl is going to prom and then she is getting married. Their oldest daughter was actually getting engaged the weekend of the graduation too.
Their family is one that inspires you to be better. They have 3 children biologically and then adopted 3 little girls from China. He also started Shoahanna's Hope, http://www.shaohannahshope.org/. They offer grants to families wishing to adopt but can't afford the financial burden of adoption.
The preschool staff and families in Maria's class were asked to be honorary pallbearers at the funeral. I honestly didn't want to go because I didn't want to face the emotions that I knew would come. I am so glad I did though. I have never been to a funeral where I left feeling so inspired. It lasted over two hours but I didn't once think "when is this going to end". It was a celebration of her life and a call to trust in God. It was gut wrenching and I had tears running down my cheeks the majority of the two hours but it was beautiful. The family stood in front of a huge audience and shared their memories and thoughts about Maria and the tragedy. The glimpse into their lives made me want to be a better mom even more than I already do. It was the best funeral I've been too but the worst as well. The image of that small casket being wheeled past me with the family sobbing as they walked beside it will never leave my mind. I can't imagine what they are feeling and honestly pray that I never will.
I have been waiting to share this on my blog because I really didn't know what to write. I'm not a good writer. I knew that I wouldn't be able to share my thoughts and feelings in words that would do them justice.
We didn't want to share the news with Grace at first. She knew and played with Stevey Joy and Maria on a daily basis at preschool. Grace thinks about dying and heaven a lot and I didn't want her to obsess about it because it hit so close to home. But, because the family was so tied into our community and so many knew them from our church, they decided to have a special class about heaven on Sunday morning for the kids to talk about Maria and what had just happened. So, we had to tell her because she was going to hear it from someone else if we didn't. To our surprise, when we told her, all she talked about was being safe on the road so she didn't get hit like Maria. Even after the class at church she hasn't talked too much about it. When she does say anything she says Maria is in Heaven with Jesus now. She also says she feels sorry for Stevey Joy because she's afraid she won't have anyone to play with.
This week I started babysitting two girls twice a week for a friend. On the first day, the youngest girl was hit in the back of the head with a golf ball that a neighbor boy launched with a baseball bat! Talk about a traumatic day! During the chaos of the moment, Grace went to the house next door to see the little sister of the boy who hit the golf ball after I specifically told her not to. She didn't tell me she was going. While I was busy taking care of Zoe's injury I noticed that Grace wasn't around but I thought she was just down in the playroom. After things had calmed down about an hour later I started to call for Grace to get her things ready to leave. She wasn't anywhere! About that time, she came walking in the back door. She had been at the house next door! I couldn't believe she went to their house without telling me after I told her not to! I was not happy to say the least. I talked to her very seriously about the dangers of going outside without me and especially without telling me she's going. Since the accident with Maria I have been even more vigilant about street safety.
So, we went home after everything had calmed down and I knew Zoe was going to be OK. Once we got home I was putting things away in the kitchen and I heard the front door open. She was going out the front door to check the mailbox, which is on the street, by herself! This was not 30 minutes after our talk about safety and going outside alone! I immediately called a "meeting" in the dining room with Grace and Lyla. We talked for a long time about what could happen to them by going in the street and going to someones house without telling me. Then when Eric came home we went over everything all over again. It just scares me to death. I see teens, or even preteens and younger, walking our neighborhood by themselves and I think, where are their moms? Am I going to let my girls do that when they're that age? I think I have them terrified of getting killed or taken by someone. Lyla just keeps saying, "yeah, and you might bleeeeed".
But, after a long afternoon of conversations about safety and getting hurt and dying Grace finally said something that made me think. As a child, she looks at things so differently. We hold onto this life with a grip that is so tight. We don't want anyone to die at all costs. We do everything in our power to stop it. But, after talking about Maria dying and the possibility of her dying she looked at me and said, "Mom, but it's OK. Maria's with Jesus in heaven and she's OK now. It's really OK because we'll be in heaven if we die."
I just finished reading a bestselling book called "The Shack". It is a fictional book about a dad whose daughter is killed by a murderer and he can't get out of his "great sadness". Well, God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit appear to him and teach him what he needs to know in order to live life to the fullest here on Earth. At one point in the book, God shows the man his daughter running and playing so that he would see how good she is in heaven. It was a neat image of a child in heaven and I keep imaging Maria like that. She's running and jumping in Jesus' arms and having a great time. I would recommend this book for anyone to read. It is fictional but it is very thought provoking and it does give a few great images of God and Jesus and the Holy Spirit to hold on to.
I guess it's because I'm getting older but it seems like there are so many more people around me that are suffering than ever before. Over the past year there have been so many deaths, miscarriages, divorce, cancer and disease in the lives of people that are in my life daily. It makes me cling to the promise of heaven and the importance of living this life with the purpose of getting there. I am also appreciating my girls much more these days. They still frustrate me daily, but I also keep hugging and kissing them and thanking God that they are healthy and here under my roof with me for one more day. I can't imagine what the Chapman's feel every night that they don't have to put Maria to bed or give her a bath. Please pray for healing for this precious family. Please pray for Will Franklin, the brother who ultimately sent Maria to heaven. Pray for Stevey Joy and the other siblings who have lost their sister and best friend.
If you would like to read more about the Chapman's, their website is. http://www.stevencurtischapman.com/ I encourage you to listen to his song and watch the video for "Cinderella". Beware though, it will most likely bring tears to your eyes.
Another gut wrenching story, that also brings me to tears, is that of a neighbor of a friend from church. She lost her newborn baby in April and then just last week her baby nephew died of SIDS. This is another family that needs prayers. Angie, the mom, has kept a blog throughout her pregnancy and loss of her newborn baby. She is an inspiration for anyone dealing with loss. You can read her story at http://www.audreycaroline.blogspot.com/. I would definitely recommend reading her story. She has a relationship with God and a faith in Him that we all should strive to have.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Cinderella
Could this be true?
Grace took her first shower by herself on Friday! I can't believe we are almost to this point. To be quite honest, I can't wait to have them both taking showers by themselves! I know as a mom, I should want to savor this time when they're little and I'm giving them baths. I should enjoy the time we spend together in the bathroom playing in the tub. But, unfortunately, bath time has never been an extremely enjoyable chore in my opinion. Luckily, I am blessed with a husband that doesn't mind taking this job most of the time. My girls never want to stop playing to wash and we continually have trouble keeping the water INSIDE the tub! It just always seems to be a stressful job for me. So, when Grace said she wanted to take a shower by herself I was all over that. I stood with my head inside the curtain giving instructions. I didn't do any of it for her! Here are a couple pics... 
Our First Day at the Pool
We went to the public pool yesterday for the first time this summer. The girls have been begging to go and watching as we drive down the road to see when it was going to be open. I kept trying to tell them that the water isn't heated and it's going to be cold, but, as kids (and most adults) are, they had to find out for themselves! It was cold! Too cold for me, that's sure. I'm a wimp when it comes to being cold. I really don't enjoy swimming cold at all. The girls will keep swimming with purple lips and shaking knees though. Here are the pictures from our first swim day. This is Lyla warming up under the towel.
The girls had fun but I decided it is past time to put them in swimming lessons. They are not content in the kiddie pool anymore! They wanted to stay in the big pool most of the time and when neither of them can really swim, it is very frustrating for me to try to handle them in the big pool by myself. It made it worse that it was too cold and I didn't want to be in the big pool. So, we're going to spend a good chunk of money on lessons whether we like it or not!Pump It Up Party
While our friends, the Hollidays, are in town they planned a Pump It Up birthday party for all three of their kids. All three kids have birthdays very close together so it works out perfectly. My girls were very excited because they love Pump It Up. For those that aren't familiar with it, Pump It Up is a place that houses about 8 of those blow-up, jumpy things that you see at big parties and festivals. The kids love it and it's actually fun for adults too. So, here are some pictures from the party.
I took a picture of Lyla before we left because she insisted on dressing herself, of course. Right now she is stuck on wearing jeans and long sleeve, blue shirts. The jeans are way too short for her. No, they're not supposed to be carpi's! The blue shirt is too little as well. The sleeves are now 3/4 length! She won't take no for an answer and it's just not a battle I care to fight. I keep thinking that she's going to realize it's getting too warm for these clothes but that hasn't happened just yet. She also has her Scooby Doo hat on that Papoo and Mimi sent for her birthday. 
When I took a picture of Lyla, Grace jumped up and wanted me to take a picture of her too. Now, on this night I actually convinced her to wear pants because she was going to be jumping and flipping. I've started trying to teach her a little modesty. She'll hang upside down on the monkey bars with one of her many dresses for all to see and not think a thing about it. But on this night, for whatever reason, she decided to listen to Mom!
After we had been at the party for about 10 minutes Grace got banged in the mouth by Lyla's head! She ended up with a seriously busted lip. She cried like her front teeth had been knocked out! She sat in my lap with an ice pack for most of the night. I felt sorry for her. It looked really bad. I'm writing this on 2nd day after the party and it's still swollen!
Even though we had an injury we had a good time with Asa, Ava Wren, and Chapel! We'll miss them when they go back to Honduras next week.
Asa and Ava Wren are back!
Our dear friends, the Hollidays, are home for a short visit from Honduras. They left in January to become missionaries for Providence World Ministries. They are helping to build an orphanage community! They moved their life and their 3 little kids to a whole new country with a whole new language! I give them tons of credit for what they're doing and teaching their children at the same time. I don't know if I could do the same. Well, anyway, they came home to visit and we met them at the park last Sunday afternoon. The kids played for a long time and loved it. My camera batteries died after taking this first shot of them together. Just my luck.
Our First Picnic of the Summer
Well, summer has officially begun for Grace and Lyla. We're out of preschool and doing the typical summer things each day. On this particular day they wanted to have a picnic outside. Our new backyard is great for that because we have two great shade trees to sit under!
(Notice Lyla's outfit! black socks, purple camo pants, white t-shirt with green and yellow)
Monday, May 19, 2008
Here is Lyla's tattoo. It is 3, of course for her birthday. The other cheek had something blue on it because blue is her favorite color.
Here is Grace's rainbow tattoo. She loves rainbows. Her birthday had a rainbow cake in January.
Here is the wonderful Scooby Doo cake. My friend, Brooke O'Dell, makes cakes for people and designed this herself. She did a great job. It was ashame I messed it up. I tried to photograph Scooby's good side but you can still see the mess up on his right cheek. I sat the cake on a cabinet in my dining room Friday night so it wouldn't get messed up by someone if it was sitting on the table. Well, the next morning I came downstairs and the morning sun was shining directly on poor Scooby. Half his cheek had melted off. It was just a puddle in the box. We tried to make him look a little better by putting some chocolate icing on his boo-boo but it still looked pretty sad. Lyla never even noticed. Sorry Brooke!
Lyla was so proud of her Scooby cake.
Now, on to the presents....She was given a few Scooby Doo dvds, which she loved. We have played all three of them already. I love them b/c they have an entire season's worth of episodes on each disc so they just keep on playing!
My sister, Julie, gave Lyla Moon Sand. She was nice enough to call me and ask for my permission before buying this for Lyla. I told her OK even though I've told Grace and Lyla no to moon sand several times in the store. I thought I'd give it a try.
This was one of the gifts we gave Lyla. I searched everywhere for ScoobyDoo figures. They are sold out at every ToysRUs store in town! They have a Mystery Machine van to go with it but it is sold out too. Ebay has several of these but they are selling for more than twice what they sell for in the store. Crazy!!! So, I kept calling the store until I finally caught the Bellevue store when they had the figures. We never did get the van. Oh well.
Lyla is turning into quite a ball fanatic. She got a baseball bat and ball from my parents and a soccer goal for the backyard. I think you can tell from the picture she was pleased with this gift.
A tee-ball set!
My grandmother sent Lyla a pretty little Dora gown. I was afraid she wouldn't wear it because she won't wear any pj's right now. It's panties only for her! But, she did where the gown last night. She was so cute.
Another big ball from my parents. It has Scooby on it. She loves this one too.
This was the other gift we gave her. A stuffed Scooby. I got this from Ebay. She loves it. 
So, after everyone left and it was later in the evening she was playing with her new toys. We got the moon sand out to see what it was like. Well, it's sand, with coloring. It is a little stickier than regular sand so you can mold it quite easily. My problem with it is the clean up, which is why I have always hesitated to get it in the past. It's not like play-doh. It's so fine that once it falls to the floor or the chair you might as well forget about it. If it's not in the pile by the time playtime is over, it's getting sweeped into the trash. The other problem is that it doesn't come with any storage containers. You have to buy those separately! I ended up putting the sand in sandwich baggies. Plus, it's impossible to not mix the 3 colors together. It's impossible to keep it in a small pile on the table too. So, I would not recommend Moon Sand simply for the mom's sake. The girls loved playing with it, but, I think it's going to go into the sandbox outside. Julie, I'm sorry to say this, but it's just too messy for inside. It should come with a little miniture sandbox to play with on the table and a container to store it in. Oh well, you live and you learn. 
Goldfish! Eric's parents brought the girls about 7 goldfish on Friday night. Well, by Saturday evening two were left. By Sunday morning, one was left! "Goldie" is still hanging on and looking pretty strong but she's all alone now. The girls love it though. 
It was a good birthday for little Lyla Belle!
